The Real Problem With Computers

You know what the real problem is with working on computers? It's not that I'm starting to develop a beer shelf starting just above my waist, and it's not the creeping carpal tunnel that's starting to make the tips of my fingers. It's not the glaze that forms over my eyes from staring at one space on the screen to long, nor is it the fact that I spend half my day deleting spam.

Nope. None of these things actually bother me. Beer shelf? Convenient for holding beers, and also helps me float better in the water. Carpal? Fuck it, I don't need the tips of my fingers for anything but typing anyways, and possibly throwing a knuckleball. My knuckleball always sucked anyways. The glaze forming over my eyes as I write this? Cured, mostly, by new glasses perscriptions and high-test coffee. Spam? If nothing else, you have to wonder at the absolute morons that must fall for some these. I mean, they must work, right? Otherwise why would people keep doing them?

The real problem with computers is the clock in the top right hand corner of my screen. It's always there. I always know what time it is, and I always know exactly how much longer I have to stay in my chair before I can leave with a clean conscience.

I don't want to know time it is! I don't wear a watch for this reason! I don't have an alarm clock next to bed anymore, largely because I spent, quite simply, disgusting amounts of time lying there watching 1:00 turn into 2:00 turn into 3:00 turn into... You get the idea.

Same thing for work. I find myself, all the time, simply glaring at the clock willing it to change from 2:48 to 2:49. For example, it has now been 2:48 for approximately three hours. Life would be so much easier if I could look up and see, well, French Hookers. That would make everything better.

OK, I gotta get back to clock-watching now, I'm almost within an hour of leaving for the weekend. Just like I have been for the past three hours.